#money #mentalhealth  #anxiety part 1 🙈

Hi All,

Happy Monday.

Wishing you all a fab week.

So let’s talk about what a lot of people don’t want to talk about/don’t feel they have ‘enough’ of (especially relating to us in our 20s/early 30s as we tread in the footsteps of grown up land expectation of perhaps ‘flat, wedding, salary, baby’ blah blah blah.

Money raises anxiety for a lot of people. So add an anxiety problem to that and yea – it ain’t too fun.

Ive always been super cautious. As someone who’s only parent was always the bread winner but a tornado swept and boom it’s quite the opposite now, I was freightened enough to want to never let this happen to me. Will never forget being 18(ish) and having under £10 to my name, super struggling and finally crying out to family to see if I could borrow a tenner…

Never again, I said.

So to date I’m pretty good. Social media may claim my life is high flying but really it’s not (by London/traditional high flying standards) it’s one that suits me. Abs. Going out is a luxury and gratitude surrounds it. Gotta love good old Gratta. Or Gertrude. Gertrude the gratitude supplier, very special place in my bulging heart. Keeps me grounded.

As an individual I’ve always had my own account, good old graduate ‘free’ overdraft, ohhhh the good old graduate free overdraft. Shrinking by the year at a pace that works for me. Then there’s savers which I ended up slowly transferring to the graduate/current as I run out of funds so make/took no ‘interest’ (pun intended) in the perks of actually having one. Then there’s an ISA. Whatever that really is. Should be called Icy…don’t touch me, if you do I’ll sink you like the Titanic. Or some you can touch but do with caution. Then there’s credit cards (cue scary music) …netherthess I’ve still managed to have a bit of doe.

As someone will an anxiety problem, I feel like I’ve been able to manage these 3in1 probably not the best deal out there (money supermarket and Google just tend to be too scary despite their ‘built for simplicity’ helpful purposes) and I’ve just plodded along.

As you get older. You realise, urm yea. Maybe I should be trying to get the best deal. Maybe I should do some research.

Marrying a man who’s studying to be an accountant, well – BOOM. Bobs your uncle, right? (He is actually mine, hi Bob 👋🏻).

Yesterday, we finally got round (I’d been pushing for it/pushing against it like one of those science forces I can’t remember the name of) for ages. For me and the other half to work together and have a ‘plan’. Plans = anxiety f(r)iend.

I say ‘finally’ because I have literally been too anxious every single time to address our finances. After always having ownership of mine and enough trust issues to cover air miles from London – Austrailia, it took me 6/7 years to even tell him anything about my ‘finances’. That happened and then all of a sudden we need to open a ‘joint’ account for wedding, saving and ‘joint’ purchases. (Don’t cue aw poor Abs and her happy ever after jabs I’m getting married etc etc you know I love Gertrude!) it’s just overwhelming. (Wilma, I’ll have an cartoon series in no time).

Help to Buy ISA was done through our personal accounts – phewf. It’s not even about the trust issues though. It’s the ‘paperwork’. The thinking. The keeping up with it. The practicalities. It’s meant to make life easier but it just scares me.

Change is always a bit daunting but just knowing I now somehow have 3 bank accounts = I must be growing up and need to be extra extra (read all about it!) cautious around money – is a bit – gulp, ‘grown up life is running away with youey.’ I’be always been (clearly – brushes dust off shoulders) a girl about words but figures. Go figure.

Anyway. To conclude yesterday’s fun – Sunday FUNday at its finest – I’ll leave you with a quote from my doting partner. “Actually, Abs. Thanks for today. It will help me by building experience when managing difficult clients.”

Abbie – the difficult wifey to be.

More on how money matters can be a pretty scary place for people with anxiety in part 2 to come. Happy Monday. Spend wisely. X

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